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One of the most wrenching problems I encounter is working with people or teams who are demoralized because of the behaviors of the person they work for. It’s even worse when those behaviors are a reflection of their organization’s leadership and culture. So why are bosses toxic? Why are they…
An expression I detest is “I can speak for everyone when I say…” Why is it assumed that you can speak for everyone in a group, or that everyone shares your preferences and opinions? This is an example of self-appointed decision making. A self-appointed decision maker, be it an individual…
Mediation is an effective problem-solving process because mediators bring tools and techniques to facilitate a collaborative conversation. Still, the process can be even more effective when the participants themselves promote cooperation and make necessary preparations prior to the start of the process. Below are a few tips to help you…
Imagine that you spent weeks of time and effort preparing for a presentation at work based on guidance from your immediate supervisor. After delivering the presentation, you stand smiling, eagerly waiting for questions. Instead, your supervisor speaks up. “This wasn’t the direction we thought you would take, so I think…
Reading not only expands your knowledge but can also stimulate the imagination, foster empathy, reduce stress and improve communication skills – all great benefits for anyone engaging in conflict conversations. What books are you planning to read this year and why? Here are some books our team has on their…
To change the mind of other people you must be open to changing your own mind first. If others cannot observe that you are willing to change at all, they are going to hold onto their beliefs tighter. But changing your own mind doesn’t mean that you have to stop…
I’m betting that most of us who work in conflict resolution, whether formally as a neutral or informally in our roles within our organizations, know well a certain sinking feeling. That is, when the people involved have had a good dialogue and worked hard to come together and yet seem…
In our professional field, we engage in a practice of reflection to support continual learning and development. Reflection is also a valuable way to learn from mistakes, gain perspective, generate ideas and acknowledge and celebrate achievements. As we close the year, our team has come together to share their reflections…
Last month my colleague posted a blog and hosted a webinar exploring the question of whether the language we use to talk about conflict limits the outcomes in conflict resolution and whether the term Conflict Engagement might open more possibilities. This subject, combined with some very unsatisfactory recent mediations, has…
Why is it so challenging for us to develop productive and meaningful approaches to conflict when conflict, in varying degrees, is something we live with daily? Conflict is a normal and inevitable aspect of our lives that can be a stimulus for positive change, and yet, the language we use…